If one door closes they say – another one opens for you. Not sure this is true all the time. Sometimes, the door that opens doesn’t look like one. It needs to become visible to us, it needs our open-mindedness to be seen. But the end of something usually implies the beginning of something else.
In most people’s lives- friends, colleagues, habits and opportunities come and go. Sometimes it is sad and other times it is actually a relief. One puzzling question is what is the right balance between constants and changes? What is needed to rejuvenate our minds and brains and make us aware that we stood and lied for far too long in our comfort zone?
Do you rearrange your living-room just because you are bored? Do you get a new phone or even car because you would only like to be seen with the latest & greatest? Do you change your clothes constantly because you don’t want to wear the same thing again (and again)? Or do you take up a new hobby to get to learn new things and get new friends? Does change inevitably drain your energy or inspire you?
More life transitional changes – for example moving can take its toll on big and small family members. But even if change can be difficult – it sometimes just needs to take place – and could often also be turned into a positive experience. Saying goodbye to your friends at school is not easy – and slipping comfortably into a new social group is equally challenging. As a parent it is important to let your children air any frustration and being the grown-up; try to highlight the upsides of the situation even if that is not always the most easy thing to do. Old friends can be visited – or come visit you. Improving one’s “getting-new-friends-skills” is also good. Those advices are valid for us adults too.
Changing jobs – especially in your forties – is a situation where it is beneficial that someone points out the upsides. At that age your acquired experience should manifest itself into some great creative task-solving, project leading or whatever ones line of business is. It is time to harvest. It’s time to shine. You have to show yourself – not only as someone with potential to rise to any needed occasion like in your twenties and thirties – but someone one expects to do the job. We both love Clay Christiansen’s hiring milkshakes example about understanding the job-to-be-done. Do we understand the ‘job’? It is very easy to doubt one self. But change demands you to find the edge. And very often it is worthwhile – and you land on your feet. The process resembles the first time you open the maths book at the start of the semester; you cannot believe that you will understand what all the pages say. But after a few months you will. With ease.
Equilibrium can be truly hard to find. New experiences, new people often provide personal development. At the same time – it is sometimes good to hold on to things that are of value. Could it even be an aim to find comfort in your set ways. Strive to appreciate what you have at the moment and what you have achieved.
Some type of change is inevitable. Embrace it. If possible try to leave the old, the bad and the ugly stuff behind. But make sure to keep the good parts. Maybe some spare ones too. You never know when you might need them..